On a daily basis I tend to have a million and one thoughts, ideas.. opinions and so much more just running through my head. And typically I can maintain these thoughts and somehow manage to write them down and form them into a decent blog. Lately, I have not been able to do that. In fact, the posts that I have put up lately have been from my old poetry that I have been working on for over a year now. The poetry that I have stashed away and saved in hopes that I will one day publish it as a book. But I have long forgotten about it since I have started up this blog of mine.
Something that I have discovered about myself within this last month is that the only way I can have a semi clear mind to write is if I can have AT LEAST 4 days a week of loneliness. I'm pretty sure that is normal with any writer. We need silence to think. But not only do I need it to write. I need it for my sanity as well. I haven't had a day to myself in over a month and I feel that its starting to wear me thin and dry. I'm extra moody. Irritable. Hateful. Just downright bitchy.
And all these thoughts i have to write are just scrambled in my head. I get excited when I think that I got a new amazing post in the making and then I sit down and cant think of any way to start it..or finish it. Its frustrating. I suppose the stresses of every day life are not helping me as well. I feel stuck. STUCK...STUCK!!! and I feel hopeless. I think hopelessness is one of the worst feelings. Its a friend to depression.
Im struggling to express any of this right now..there is just too much going on that I want to write about.. And hopefully I will soon find my quiet time..And get back on the writting grind... I hope..
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